I just skimmed a bit, but he misses what I always found to be the most confusing aspect of the Cain and Abel story. Cain and Abel are Adam and Eve's kids, yet Cain is worried about other people doing him harm. Who are these other people?

How long is Plots going to keep this up? Or, I guess I mean: how long are Slate readers going to put up with his precis of the Bible? I find it fascinating (hence my short tenure as a religion major); but I bet he's going to lose readership before he gets to Melchizedek.

He's certainly going to lose the ability to use his spell checker when he gets to Melchizedek.

Ha! (omg, did I spell it wrong?)

I spelled "Plotz" wrong (but I fixed it).

Sure. Now you just make me look bad. I was taking my spelling cues from you!

he's going to get really, really bored once the second half of exodus starts.

And Leviticus is a real upper!

His post on Genesis seemed kind of disconnected and incoherent, but maybe that just reflects Genesis itself. I tried to read the Bible through once or twice (coming from essentially the same level of ignorance as Plotz, possibly more) and just couldn't get interested in it as a collection of stories.

I wasn't actually commenting on anyone's spelling, just the difficulty of spelling anything Biblical that didn't manage to stick around to the modern era.

honestly, seriously, the bible is so fucking stupid.

i can't believe i live in a world where people worship the pointless scribblings of fucking cave people.

whose scribblings would you prefer people to worship? if you have to pick some aspect, old isn't a bad one...at least you can say "well, other people worshipped them first"

silly, silly logic. i repeat: cave people.

and for the record, whoever said i wanted to "worship" anything? i mock anyone who thinks that "worship" of any kind is necessary.

just for the record, with gallon upon gallon of steroids considered, the testosterone levels and attitudes of many of the red sox are likely akin to cave people. need i even refute your claim you don't worship anything?

oh come on. first, name one red sox player who is even suspected of being a steroid user. you can't; none of our guys have ever been implicated. the closest was nomar, and he's been gone for 2 years already.

second, i don't "worship" the red sox. i know you're being goofy, but still. it's not like i'd kill for the red sox.

okay, i guess i would. but only yankees fans, because they don't count as people.

If God had a blog would it be the bible (or some other holy book)?

Blogging the bible is like blogging a cookbook. Unless you make something out of it, you miss the whole point. Questioning the ingredients or methodology may (or may not) enlighten you as to the finished product.

You will find in the bible whatever it is you are looking for. Whether it is solutions to your problem or problems to the solution, you will find them. It's not hard to shoot holes in the story of mankind's first family, and it's not hard to see the message in this simple story. God's second greatest gift to you is the ability to reason (You know, the fruit of the tree of knowledge.), don't stop using it when reading God's message.

The bible: inspired by God, but written by humans. God made man in his own image, and man has being trying to make God in his ever since.

It will be interesting to see if David Plotz develops a self-righteous attitude as he digests the bible which appears to happen to a lot of people who do as he is doing. Will he demand tolerance for his beliefs and display intolerance for the beliefs of others? Will he claim he can only be judged by God, but will pass judgment on others? Such is the way of the recently converted.

Yea, verily I say unto thee. Go forth and do likewise.

the bible: inspired by centuries of nomadic peoples' mythtelling, written down and revised over centuries by various political leaders in the kingdoms of judea and babylon, translated in the courts of kings by power-hungry priests, taken too seriously by simple-minded american politicians, and sold at the barnes and noble down the street for $19.95.